How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Dahn the Borough market early this morning. (Fatchav rules btw)
Magik the Tajik had a new tomato-licker in ‘oo needed some training. (I still think it’s a glaring indictment of our government’s attrocious handling of the economy that it’s cheaper to bring in an illegal third cousin to lick the tomatos clean than use water from the tap)
So we’re in the Market Porter for a few SunUppers and Mad Mickey and Magik just can’t give it a rest on the whole Michael Jackson thing. I tell you after a half-dozen pints of Snogsnifter and a full English out the Kebaberie, I was both touching cloth and ready to dribble. There was nearly an incident like when Mad Mickey slammed Dribbly Del’s colostomy bag as he danced on the table dahn the club and it exploded all over Magik’s missus. Not a pretty sight. But then she never was. Magik traded ‘er for a nice Bactrian camel once. But it took the ‘ump.
Mad Mickey is the worst. You’d think being Scottish ‘e’d ‘ave some sympathy with the downtrodden but nah, ‘e wis on fine fettle.
Q: What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is white, made out of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other you can carry your grogeries in.
Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has a hot date?
A: There’s a big wheel parked outside his house.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them.
Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.
Why does the world smell like burning plastic? Oh yeah! Michael Jackson’s burning in hell!
And for the seppos:
I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning. He ate a 10 year old wiener.
They said Michael Jackson died of a heart attack, but they actualy found him in the children’s ward having a stroke!
“Give it a rest!”.
I shout as I shoot out the door realsing I’m never going to get to the bog in time and the door to Vinopolis is a better bet.
ascei8gdu9
Tags: Borough Market, Dribbly Del, government, incontinence, London, Mad Mickey MacMental, Magik the Tajik, Michael Jackson, snogsnifter, The Market Porter, tomato-licker
July 10th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
A fine example of olde English humour.
Or should that be a fine example of an olde English tumour.
April 17th, 2010 at 4:23 pm
I wrote about that in my blog about Mioma